I've been meaning to write stuff forever, but as you might guess, I start to imagine that I've blogged and then get sad when I realize that my mind has played a trick on me. And then it's just too much to update you folks on! Really, from our trip to Northbrook Lodge, to Nantucket, our nasty cold, our first day of school, our ballet class, our pot-lucks, our 2 festivals (one Irish, one Greek)... and then all of my conflicting realizations about being a parent. I feel like I've learned a lot in the last 2 months... particularly how nice it is to have a dad around on weekends and evenings. We are a great team when it comes to the fine art of kid wrangling. It makes me love my husband again! Seriously, Myles is a totally different person without the added stress and over-tiredness that his profession demands. It has been pleasant to rediscover why I fell for Myles in the first place. After 11 years with the same person you are bound to forget a few of those things that make you like someone so much. So, research rocks (but the pay check doesn't).
This photo of Penny speaks volumes - because really she kind of gets put in weird places (the Flickr site shows us putting her in a giant stew pot) and is occasionally forgotten. Like the time I almost walked out of the restaurant WITHOUT her... as she snoozed in the car seat resting on the highchair. It's given me a couple of good nightmares about misplacing the baby.
The Ms. tee shirt shown here was mine from 1976. My nieces Chloe and Daisy have both worn it, Ru and El wore it (briefly) and now Penny gets to show it off again! 30 year-old fashion making a fine feminist statement. And Myles' giant MAN hand holding the handles, the sand in the background! What's not to love? I could go on and on...
Friday, September 14, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
Fucktucket
With a new family member I have been faced with the challenge of outfitting myself in decent clothing. Every tank top and skirt I own has a stubborn stain or two and is several sizes too large. I keep thinking I'm going to shed 15 pounds of baby weight before I need to get warmer clothes for the fall... so I'll hang out like a slob in these hideous baggy get-ups until I'm freezing. Nantucket has a way of making me lust uncontrollably for new and beautiful things to wear. The shopping here is totally out of control and unique - some disgusting stuff, some completely outrageous stuff that I could never bear to afford, and some really spectacular yummy stuff that I could see myself wearing and treasuring for years. Many of my favorite fall sweaters have come from a boutique here, and I'll wear them again and again once I can fit in them.
Without a babysitter I can't really go shopping though. Shopping with the baby is silly (the front carrier doesn't allow for try-ons, and the stroller just annoys me and takes up room) and shopping with the twins ends up with a game of hide-and-seek in the clothing racks. This struggle to shop got me thinking about how obsessed I am with buying useless crap and how potentially I could be "greener" (did I just use that word in relationship to fashion? Shocking.) even though it doesn't really come naturally in my clothing sensibilities. So, with that said, I might attempt to post my very first link. When I'm not busy cleaning my house or bossing my kids around, I'm usually found on the computer reading up on crafting and how to be more environmentally kind. (Notice how I said reading rather than being... I have a lot to learn and a lot to change.) We all have to start somewhere when it comes to saving the planet, and this spectacular place called Nantucket has me thinking and feeling more than ever.
Some of that "feeling" refers to fondling cashmere... some of it refers to protecting the island.
Go now fellow readers and soak up some healthy stuff.
Without a babysitter I can't really go shopping though. Shopping with the baby is silly (the front carrier doesn't allow for try-ons, and the stroller just annoys me and takes up room) and shopping with the twins ends up with a game of hide-and-seek in the clothing racks. This struggle to shop got me thinking about how obsessed I am with buying useless crap and how potentially I could be "greener" (did I just use that word in relationship to fashion? Shocking.) even though it doesn't really come naturally in my clothing sensibilities. So, with that said, I might attempt to post my very first link. When I'm not busy cleaning my house or bossing my kids around, I'm usually found on the computer reading up on crafting and how to be more environmentally kind. (Notice how I said reading rather than being... I have a lot to learn and a lot to change.) We all have to start somewhere when it comes to saving the planet, and this spectacular place called Nantucket has me thinking and feeling more than ever.
Some of that "feeling" refers to fondling cashmere... some of it refers to protecting the island.
Go now fellow readers and soak up some healthy stuff.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
correction
At the end of the last post I wrote "Rhode Izzle"... but I know better. It's fo' shizzle the "Rho-Izzle".
Apologies to all my peeps.
Apologies to all my peeps.
CIO
To those of you who are not parents... and to those of you who don't care about stupid online acronyms... CIO stands for "cry-it-out". Yeah. I've just begun that insanity that is - how do I get my baby to sleep? I'm not doing anything yet as far as letting Penny cry to sleep is concerned, but the thought has crossed my mind earlier than it did with Ruby and Eloise! We have been in Nantucket for a week now and I've noticed that because the girls have a pretty scheduled bedtime scenerio, Penny is awake from about 7 to 10 pm. 10 o'clock is NOT a good bedtime for a little peanut her size, and she kind of doesn't really understand how to nurse herself to sleep (except when she wakes at 3 AM, which is a good thing). How do people balance 2 bedtime routines? It's not like I can make the bathtub fit all three of my kids - and I want to give Penny her own nighttime ritual. Oh, and I selfishly want to sniff her clean, fluffy hair after I've given her a sweet little newborn bath in the kitchen sink. I'm just coming to terms with the fact that Ms. Easy Going Baby will eventually have to grow up and learn to sleep. I'm noticing the signs of Cranky Mom in the early evening because I can't figure out how to swing this. And I have no idea how to make a decent dinner anymore.
Wait, did I ever have a minute to make a decent dinner in the last 3 years? Do I have to wait 3 more years to start feeding the family yummy stuff? Maybe so. (I feel like I blogged about this subject not so long ago when I actually roasted a chicken and was really proud of myself. How pathetic.)
Well, on a completely different note, Nantucket has been pretty pleasant. Different, but pleasant. And I just ADORE having Myles come out here for the weekends with us... and I'm happily anticipating a year with his presence in the home. To all of you who have a dad who works 9 to 5 (or the equivalent), consider yourselves lucky. Having Myles as a surgery intern was the shittiest scene ever. Stay-at-home Moms with Docs for husbands have it HARD, and I've just begun to deeply understand how hard it was because I can compare it to something better! That being said, one day I will have to return to my former status as Pseudo Single Mom when Myles resumes his residency... my very own cry-it-out experience to look forward to!
The spectacular photos will get posted upon my return to the Rhode Izzle. We have some good ones from the mountains AND the beaches... man are we lucky people this summer...
Wait, did I ever have a minute to make a decent dinner in the last 3 years? Do I have to wait 3 more years to start feeding the family yummy stuff? Maybe so. (I feel like I blogged about this subject not so long ago when I actually roasted a chicken and was really proud of myself. How pathetic.)
Well, on a completely different note, Nantucket has been pretty pleasant. Different, but pleasant. And I just ADORE having Myles come out here for the weekends with us... and I'm happily anticipating a year with his presence in the home. To all of you who have a dad who works 9 to 5 (or the equivalent), consider yourselves lucky. Having Myles as a surgery intern was the shittiest scene ever. Stay-at-home Moms with Docs for husbands have it HARD, and I've just begun to deeply understand how hard it was because I can compare it to something better! That being said, one day I will have to return to my former status as Pseudo Single Mom when Myles resumes his residency... my very own cry-it-out experience to look forward to!
The spectacular photos will get posted upon my return to the Rhode Izzle. We have some good ones from the mountains AND the beaches... man are we lucky people this summer...
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Penny the Expressive Baby
She's only 5 weeks old and has so many different faces - it cracks me up constantly. Good thing I purchased myself a spankin' new fancy camera. It should take me some time before I figure out about 1/4th of what it's capable of doing.
Actually when I took my first shot and listened to the shutter click I swear I felt my hair stand on end. It almost made me want to cry! You see, I've been saving up for a treat like this for a long long time. I don't think I've ever had the restraint to save - but I must say that it has so much more meaning when you put the heart into your "savings". My intent with the camera goes far beyond just taking cute snapshots of my family... it's a long overdue reconnection to my creative side. I'm hoping it jumpstarts my artwork again by being a visual journal - a collection of inspiring colors and images that I can pull from.
On the savings tip, Myles saved up some of his own money to splurge on a spiffy television for our bedroom. Even the UPS guy said, "you've got yourself a nice one here" when he dropped off the package! Although I said we didn't need another tv, I'd be lying if I said I didn't like how it allows for a little more sleep in the morning. I'm such a junky parent! Plop on a show for the kiddos... close your eyes for another half hour... heavenly.
Off to pack up for our road trip. Better photos next time... I promise.
Actually when I took my first shot and listened to the shutter click I swear I felt my hair stand on end. It almost made me want to cry! You see, I've been saving up for a treat like this for a long long time. I don't think I've ever had the restraint to save - but I must say that it has so much more meaning when you put the heart into your "savings". My intent with the camera goes far beyond just taking cute snapshots of my family... it's a long overdue reconnection to my creative side. I'm hoping it jumpstarts my artwork again by being a visual journal - a collection of inspiring colors and images that I can pull from.
On the savings tip, Myles saved up some of his own money to splurge on a spiffy television for our bedroom. Even the UPS guy said, "you've got yourself a nice one here" when he dropped off the package! Although I said we didn't need another tv, I'd be lying if I said I didn't like how it allows for a little more sleep in the morning. I'm such a junky parent! Plop on a show for the kiddos... close your eyes for another half hour... heavenly.
Off to pack up for our road trip. Better photos next time... I promise.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
yes, i am lame
Okay, so a couple of you wanted me to post a link to my flickr site... but because I am a total LAME-O computer user I don't know how to make this happen. Honestly, I think I should take few minutes and figure this out from "blogger help", but I'm a lazy fucker and prefer to say this: a single click on any posted photo should take you directly to my flickr site. If not, please let me know.
We are headed off to the Adirondacks for a few days (departing tomorrow evening) to see Myles' family - including the famous 91 year old Grandma Betty (a.k.a. My Hero!). I'm hoping to get my ass in a canoe at the very least, while someone looks after Penny.
I'm ashamed that I can't make moments for writing all of my crazy thoughts these days. There is a bunch to sort out in my head - as the addition of a new family member can make one a bit NUTTY to say the least. I can't say that I'm suffering from any PPD (post partum depression for those of you not into mamma-lingo), but I'm suffering from something. Well... maybe not suffering. But something. So many little things happen that make my mind go wild with philosophical thought. I'm just wired with a bunch of good things to say and share, yet the second I sit myself down to write, it's as if someone sucked my brain dry. Is it because I"m nursing?
For example, while we were in Nantucket I sent Ru and El out to the toy store with my dad. Upon their return my dad mentioned that Ruby announced she wasn't wearing any underwear while walking up Main Street. I had forgotten to get her back in some undies after she peed in her pants! No undies and a dress. Good job Mom. I guess that's pretty harmless though. Because the same spacey person also forgot to put sunblock on the bottom half of Eloise at the beach. Three good hours worth of unprotected sun on her sweet white skin - not so pretty. Now I know exactly why my mom calls out everyone else's name before she gets to mine. We seem to short circuit when we are parents, so then throw in the old age factor and you have a malfunctioning machine.
Myles and I were watching television last night and passed by Eddie Murphy's "Raw". I had to make a comment on Eddie's HIDEOUS skin-tight blue and black leather "outfit" of sorts. Myles asked, "what year was this movie made?" I said, "1986". It was 1987... but then Myles replied, "TWENTY YEARS AGO!"
And that seems like ages when you hear TWENTY. Really though, 1987 doesn't seem like it was that far away. Right? I mean, Myles and I had been dating for a year in 1997. (Yes. We are celebrating 11 years together this summer.)
Well, hopefully by the next post I'll have had the opportunity to use my new swanky camera (a digital SLR!) and you can feast your eyes on my yummy, squishy, tan baby. She has a jew-fro mowhawk - no joke.
We are headed off to the Adirondacks for a few days (departing tomorrow evening) to see Myles' family - including the famous 91 year old Grandma Betty (a.k.a. My Hero!). I'm hoping to get my ass in a canoe at the very least, while someone looks after Penny.
I'm ashamed that I can't make moments for writing all of my crazy thoughts these days. There is a bunch to sort out in my head - as the addition of a new family member can make one a bit NUTTY to say the least. I can't say that I'm suffering from any PPD (post partum depression for those of you not into mamma-lingo), but I'm suffering from something. Well... maybe not suffering. But something. So many little things happen that make my mind go wild with philosophical thought. I'm just wired with a bunch of good things to say and share, yet the second I sit myself down to write, it's as if someone sucked my brain dry. Is it because I"m nursing?
For example, while we were in Nantucket I sent Ru and El out to the toy store with my dad. Upon their return my dad mentioned that Ruby announced she wasn't wearing any underwear while walking up Main Street. I had forgotten to get her back in some undies after she peed in her pants! No undies and a dress. Good job Mom. I guess that's pretty harmless though. Because the same spacey person also forgot to put sunblock on the bottom half of Eloise at the beach. Three good hours worth of unprotected sun on her sweet white skin - not so pretty. Now I know exactly why my mom calls out everyone else's name before she gets to mine. We seem to short circuit when we are parents, so then throw in the old age factor and you have a malfunctioning machine.
Myles and I were watching television last night and passed by Eddie Murphy's "Raw". I had to make a comment on Eddie's HIDEOUS skin-tight blue and black leather "outfit" of sorts. Myles asked, "what year was this movie made?" I said, "1986". It was 1987... but then Myles replied, "TWENTY YEARS AGO!"
And that seems like ages when you hear TWENTY. Really though, 1987 doesn't seem like it was that far away. Right? I mean, Myles and I had been dating for a year in 1997. (Yes. We are celebrating 11 years together this summer.)
Well, hopefully by the next post I'll have had the opportunity to use my new swanky camera (a digital SLR!) and you can feast your eyes on my yummy, squishy, tan baby. She has a jew-fro mowhawk - no joke.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Perfection!
My best friend is married- and I could go on forever about how exceptionally perfect her wedding was - but I just don't have the time or brain cells to write anything decent. My sister's wedding is also worth mentioning. It was perfect too. How lucky are we? It's pretty unreal actually. (Penelope went to a wedding at 11 days old and slept through most of everything. She barely made a peep the entire weekend and I managed to have fun on the dance floor... wiggling and jiggling all of the saggy and depressing flesh around my middle.)
So I have photos of Lyllah and Rick's wedding on the flickr site, but I drown my camera in the bottom of my diaper bag before I got to Nantucket for Gwennie's wedding. An entire bottle of water exploded and drenched all kinds of things in the bag... and this means I have to buy a new camera PRONTO! I have to capture Miss Pickle in her roundness... new baby time goes exceptionally fast. In fact, little Penny is almost 11 pounds now - which the doctor thought was pretty impressive - and looks like a total breast-fed monkey. Double chin, baby acne and a faux hawk. She's fuckin' adorable and smells like goat cheese. (I find keeping her clean rather difficult considering that I usually bathe Ru and El every night, and I like to shower too sometimes...)
I feel like these blog entries are going to dwindle away if I'm not careful. Figuring out how to manage the house, laundry, personal hygeine, nursing, napping, groceries, garden, house plants, cat hair and sister brawls has been challenging to say the least. But we have been travelling for 3 consecutive weekends now and I can't say that I've really even unpacked.
Overall, we are doing well. I am kind of in "survival mode" and waiting for a break in this adrenaline rush though.
Oh, and I MUST not forget to put in a detailed labor story at some point. I learned that waiting for natural labor to come would have been WAAAAAY better than being induced (duh.) and that epidurals really do mess with your ability to push (just like the books tell you). That being said, a vaginal delivery is 100 times easier to recover from than a c-section. (hurrah for the va jay-jay!!)
So I have photos of Lyllah and Rick's wedding on the flickr site, but I drown my camera in the bottom of my diaper bag before I got to Nantucket for Gwennie's wedding. An entire bottle of water exploded and drenched all kinds of things in the bag... and this means I have to buy a new camera PRONTO! I have to capture Miss Pickle in her roundness... new baby time goes exceptionally fast. In fact, little Penny is almost 11 pounds now - which the doctor thought was pretty impressive - and looks like a total breast-fed monkey. Double chin, baby acne and a faux hawk. She's fuckin' adorable and smells like goat cheese. (I find keeping her clean rather difficult considering that I usually bathe Ru and El every night, and I like to shower too sometimes...)
I feel like these blog entries are going to dwindle away if I'm not careful. Figuring out how to manage the house, laundry, personal hygeine, nursing, napping, groceries, garden, house plants, cat hair and sister brawls has been challenging to say the least. But we have been travelling for 3 consecutive weekends now and I can't say that I've really even unpacked.
Overall, we are doing well. I am kind of in "survival mode" and waiting for a break in this adrenaline rush though.
Oh, and I MUST not forget to put in a detailed labor story at some point. I learned that waiting for natural labor to come would have been WAAAAAY better than being induced (duh.) and that epidurals really do mess with your ability to push (just like the books tell you). That being said, a vaginal delivery is 100 times easier to recover from than a c-section. (hurrah for the va jay-jay!!)
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
just a glimpse...
Hey, I had a little girl named Penelope Anne. She was 8 lbs, 4 oz... just 4 hours shy of a July 4th birthday - and she was really really difficult to push out, but I did it! I would like to post this nice detailed account of my labor drama, but I don't actually have the time or energy right now.
We are all doing well, anticipating 2 wedding weekends in a row, and hoping that you all feast your eyes on my flickr pages with the delicious new photos of our family of FIVE!
We are all doing well, anticipating 2 wedding weekends in a row, and hoping that you all feast your eyes on my flickr pages with the delicious new photos of our family of FIVE!
Monday, July 02, 2007
Still No Baby!
I'm headed to the doctor in about an hour and I'm still really conflicted about going for the induction or not. The thought of being hooked up to an IV makes me really anxious and grumpy - but so does the idea of being pregnant for another week. What to do?
I promise to keep you all posted once I've made my decision.
I promise to keep you all posted once I've made my decision.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
To the Beach!
No, we haven't made it out to Nantucket yet, but we did take an adventure out to a pretty decent Rhody beach on Monday. This is the only open-eyed picture I got to capture - little Ruby enjoying her time in the sand, poking beach trash into a sculpture.
Myles is home and not working for the week (and potentially just going to hang in there with the Ortho research) and we are sweating it out with the fans and the kid pool most of the time. Ru and El have 2 more days left of Montessori Camp (boo!) and I have 1 more day left until my due date. This is not the weather to be THIS pregnant in! Gross. I'd like a personal fan for my crotch and under my boobs. (Speaking of crotches, Ruby came home from camp with a cool little sponge shaped like a bug, which she referred to as a "crotch roach". I laugh out loud even thinking about it... crotch roach. When she said that, I responded: "No, I think a crotch roach is something very different.")
As for my medical situation, my doctor has agreed to check my progress on Monday morning and if my cervix is still closed and posterior we will begin a pitocin induction on Monday night - that is, if I'm up for it. Otherwise she'll let me hang in there a bit longer and wait for natural labor to begin. The baby isn't in any danger, in fact, it's thriving with a happy heart rate. That probably has something to do with the number of disgustingly fattening meals I keep eating... ice cream, onion rings, chicken fingers, chocolate milk. I'm even going to head out to world's most spicy Indian restaurant for lunch. But besides the healthy baby in me, I'm not doing so well with the stress of being pregnant. I just suck to be around and I'm pretty frustrated that I have 2 very important weddings to go to in July. Somehow those events have made me really impatient to meet the baby and I'm not really willing to be such a warrior and wait for the real contractions to come.
But we shall see... maybe I'll wake up on Monday and feel as if I can be patient for what the greater powers have in store for the new Webster's astrological chart - in which case you get to wait even longer for cute baby photos and a detailed labor story!
(I'm SO going to the mall for the air conditioning this afternoon.)
Myles is home and not working for the week (and potentially just going to hang in there with the Ortho research) and we are sweating it out with the fans and the kid pool most of the time. Ru and El have 2 more days left of Montessori Camp (boo!) and I have 1 more day left until my due date. This is not the weather to be THIS pregnant in! Gross. I'd like a personal fan for my crotch and under my boobs. (Speaking of crotches, Ruby came home from camp with a cool little sponge shaped like a bug, which she referred to as a "crotch roach". I laugh out loud even thinking about it... crotch roach. When she said that, I responded: "No, I think a crotch roach is something very different.")
As for my medical situation, my doctor has agreed to check my progress on Monday morning and if my cervix is still closed and posterior we will begin a pitocin induction on Monday night - that is, if I'm up for it. Otherwise she'll let me hang in there a bit longer and wait for natural labor to begin. The baby isn't in any danger, in fact, it's thriving with a happy heart rate. That probably has something to do with the number of disgustingly fattening meals I keep eating... ice cream, onion rings, chicken fingers, chocolate milk. I'm even going to head out to world's most spicy Indian restaurant for lunch. But besides the healthy baby in me, I'm not doing so well with the stress of being pregnant. I just suck to be around and I'm pretty frustrated that I have 2 very important weddings to go to in July. Somehow those events have made me really impatient to meet the baby and I'm not really willing to be such a warrior and wait for the real contractions to come.
But we shall see... maybe I'll wake up on Monday and feel as if I can be patient for what the greater powers have in store for the new Webster's astrological chart - in which case you get to wait even longer for cute baby photos and a detailed labor story!
(I'm SO going to the mall for the air conditioning this afternoon.)
Thursday, June 21, 2007
So You Think You Can Dance
Does anybody watch this show on Wednesday and Thursday nights like I do? Oh my. It's 1,000 times better than American Idol, but with the same format. Crazy talented dancers compete for America's votes while we get to listen to an incredibly sassy and offensive panel of judges. So You Think You Can Dance. Amazing. And a new season of Top Chef immediately following at 10 pm. Ugh. I'm such a slave to my television at the end of the day. Other than that it's Netflix movies for the summer.
I recently rediscovered the actual newspaper - not just my TimesSelect Online subscription. But will they ever manufacture a newspaper that doesn't get ink all over your fingers? Maybe it's just because I have sweaty pregnant lady hands, or maybe it's because I have sunblock residue on my fingertips (I get the paper and a coffee right after I drop the girls off at camp for the morning... so I have to cover them in stinky SPF 45 before they go) but I actually get annoyed by my newspapery black inky hands. I'm sure it doesn't help my complexion either... because guess who's always touching her face and scratching her nose?
This is Myles' second to last night of call before the END of his surgical intern year. He's on again on Saturday, and then we party... and I stress out a little because I don't know if he's going to really go through with his Ortho research for the year. He has recently disclosed his interest in taking the summer off to study for Step 3 (med licensing exam) and then looking for moonlighting opportunities in and around here and Boston. His new direction is anesthesiology - which thrills me to no end - but I'm feeling really frustrated that he didn't approach this earlier. I'm not really in a good mental place to be supportive of random career choices, even if they are ultimately better for our family in the long run. I know Myles is frustrated with my negative response to his decision and I'm having a terrible time of being nice. I don't want to make the discussion all about me... but motherfucker! I'm due with a baby in 7 days and I'm dealing with the already irritating phenomenon of the disappearing pseudo contractions that never amount to anything. Even I hate me right now - so don't throw me any curveballs, right?
Why can't this just be smooth and easy? I'm so happy being in Providence and I'm not really prepared to make any big changes in the next 2 years as far as location is concerned, but this will have to happen once he figures out where to continue his residency. Maybe if I had some real sense of our family's future I'd finally relax and let the baby out. I mean, aren't you all waiting for some new adorable baby photos and to see what mysterious name Myles has picked out? And is it a boy or a girl? The suspense is killing me.
Off to eat some ice cream... then to restless sleep.
I recently rediscovered the actual newspaper - not just my TimesSelect Online subscription. But will they ever manufacture a newspaper that doesn't get ink all over your fingers? Maybe it's just because I have sweaty pregnant lady hands, or maybe it's because I have sunblock residue on my fingertips (I get the paper and a coffee right after I drop the girls off at camp for the morning... so I have to cover them in stinky SPF 45 before they go) but I actually get annoyed by my newspapery black inky hands. I'm sure it doesn't help my complexion either... because guess who's always touching her face and scratching her nose?
This is Myles' second to last night of call before the END of his surgical intern year. He's on again on Saturday, and then we party... and I stress out a little because I don't know if he's going to really go through with his Ortho research for the year. He has recently disclosed his interest in taking the summer off to study for Step 3 (med licensing exam) and then looking for moonlighting opportunities in and around here and Boston. His new direction is anesthesiology - which thrills me to no end - but I'm feeling really frustrated that he didn't approach this earlier. I'm not really in a good mental place to be supportive of random career choices, even if they are ultimately better for our family in the long run. I know Myles is frustrated with my negative response to his decision and I'm having a terrible time of being nice. I don't want to make the discussion all about me... but motherfucker! I'm due with a baby in 7 days and I'm dealing with the already irritating phenomenon of the disappearing pseudo contractions that never amount to anything. Even I hate me right now - so don't throw me any curveballs, right?
Why can't this just be smooth and easy? I'm so happy being in Providence and I'm not really prepared to make any big changes in the next 2 years as far as location is concerned, but this will have to happen once he figures out where to continue his residency. Maybe if I had some real sense of our family's future I'd finally relax and let the baby out. I mean, aren't you all waiting for some new adorable baby photos and to see what mysterious name Myles has picked out? And is it a boy or a girl? The suspense is killing me.
Off to eat some ice cream... then to restless sleep.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Waiting at the Finish Line
Myles ran in the Milton Road Race again this year, and I curiously forgot to take any pictures of his sweaty, healthy being sprinting towards the finish. Instead I grabbed this great shot of how helpful grandparents can be when you have kids who are tired of standing up.
After a visit to the doctor on Thursday it was determined that I am not actually dilated at all... which many loving kind women have told me means NOTHING as far as when you will really go into labor. I'm pretty sure I'm in for the long haul here, especially considering that I made it this far with twins and they still wouldn't come out even with the induction! Eleven more days until the due date...
I go from feeling extremely antsy and annoyed at being pregnant, to being completely content with whatever time frame this baby wants to work with. It's damn uncomfortable though when the weather gets this hot.
Here's what's yummy: gazpacho and ceviche. I suggest you go make some right now...
After a visit to the doctor on Thursday it was determined that I am not actually dilated at all... which many loving kind women have told me means NOTHING as far as when you will really go into labor. I'm pretty sure I'm in for the long haul here, especially considering that I made it this far with twins and they still wouldn't come out even with the induction! Eleven more days until the due date...
I go from feeling extremely antsy and annoyed at being pregnant, to being completely content with whatever time frame this baby wants to work with. It's damn uncomfortable though when the weather gets this hot.
Here's what's yummy: gazpacho and ceviche. I suggest you go make some right now...
Saturday, June 09, 2007
nothing new
I really wish I had something interesting to share with everybody - something monumental like a new family member, a fresh insight on parenting, even another cute photo would be nice... but I have NOTHING. Just a giant belly. I was looking at that picture of myself from last week and I know I'm even larger than that. Seven days and that many more nutrients packed into this little being inside of me. This very moment I'm restraining myself from eating an entire jar full of my mom's spiced almonds and the rest of a cinnamon bun. I have already consumed a bowl of oatmeal and an almond croissant. Oh this poor baby.
Last night I was fantasizing and longing for the sensation of sleeping on my stomach. I'd love to just roll from one side of the bed clear to the other side... roll roll roll. But for now the options are: right side or left side with a brief stopover on my back to register how uncomfortable that is. And I'd love to have a regular sized pee - a pee long enough to make me feel like my efforts to get to the bathroom were worthwhile. Wait, have I ever mentioned how difficult it is to pee in that fucking cup at my doctor's appointments? You try aiming piss in a tiny container when you can't see your vagina... let alone reach it!
Tomorrow we are hosting a bridal shower for my pal Lyllah at my mom's house. My mom and I have been cooking a bunch of labor-intensive asian foods while the girls play with all of my toys left over from the 80's. It's actually been kind of pleasant because Myles is on call and my dad is in Virginia racing cars. Just us ladies doing lady-ish things. My mom made the observation that our houses are remarkably cleaner and we get more things done when our husbands aren't around. No pubes on the bar of soap and no dishes in the sink!
Perhaps I'll post some photos of Ly's shower if I manage to remember to take pictures...
Last night I was fantasizing and longing for the sensation of sleeping on my stomach. I'd love to just roll from one side of the bed clear to the other side... roll roll roll. But for now the options are: right side or left side with a brief stopover on my back to register how uncomfortable that is. And I'd love to have a regular sized pee - a pee long enough to make me feel like my efforts to get to the bathroom were worthwhile. Wait, have I ever mentioned how difficult it is to pee in that fucking cup at my doctor's appointments? You try aiming piss in a tiny container when you can't see your vagina... let alone reach it!
Tomorrow we are hosting a bridal shower for my pal Lyllah at my mom's house. My mom and I have been cooking a bunch of labor-intensive asian foods while the girls play with all of my toys left over from the 80's. It's actually been kind of pleasant because Myles is on call and my dad is in Virginia racing cars. Just us ladies doing lady-ish things. My mom made the observation that our houses are remarkably cleaner and we get more things done when our husbands aren't around. No pubes on the bar of soap and no dishes in the sink!
Perhaps I'll post some photos of Ly's shower if I manage to remember to take pictures...
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Stealing Glasses - Again!
Last weekend we headed out to Nantucket in order to kick off Myles' vacation week and I got a chance to capture my girls in full silliness while they romped around the yard with the sprinkler. I HIGHLY recommend heading to my flickr photos to see just how funny this series of photos turned out. Ruby looks tremendous in my Marc by Marc sunglasses, and Eloise is a picture of intellectual cuteness in my mom's purple wire-rims. In fact, if they ever had to wear glasses I'd choose this wire-rim look for them in a second.
Both girls begin "camp" for the month of June on Monday. 4 hours a day, 5 days a week! What the hell am I going to do with myself? I can't possibly keep up with this organizational garbage - or my home will be devoid of all characteristic mess and clutter!
I can't believe how grown up Ruby and Eloise have gotten in recent weeks. It's wildly disconcerting - because it's like I'm hanging out with someone else's children. They tell me all sorts of amazing facts, they catch me on various "fibs" that I might be utilizing (i.e., "mommy, you said there wasn't any bread left for french toast but I see a whole loaf in the corner over there...", they remind me what I need to buy at CVS ("Don't forget the toothpaste. We need new toothpaste."), they comfort one another and have amazing empathetic "twin" moments, and they managed to have their blood drawn without crying. (I was dreading the 3 year old lead screening because of Providence's ancient lead pipes...). Oh, and I'm going to jinx myself tonight by saying this, but they haven't peed in their beds in weeks! They wake up to tell me they need to go to the bathroom... I never EVER could picture what it would look like to have completely potty trained children, but VOILA! What a luxury.
Both girls begin "camp" for the month of June on Monday. 4 hours a day, 5 days a week! What the hell am I going to do with myself? I can't possibly keep up with this organizational garbage - or my home will be devoid of all characteristic mess and clutter!
I can't believe how grown up Ruby and Eloise have gotten in recent weeks. It's wildly disconcerting - because it's like I'm hanging out with someone else's children. They tell me all sorts of amazing facts, they catch me on various "fibs" that I might be utilizing (i.e., "mommy, you said there wasn't any bread left for french toast but I see a whole loaf in the corner over there...", they remind me what I need to buy at CVS ("Don't forget the toothpaste. We need new toothpaste."), they comfort one another and have amazing empathetic "twin" moments, and they managed to have their blood drawn without crying. (I was dreading the 3 year old lead screening because of Providence's ancient lead pipes...). Oh, and I'm going to jinx myself tonight by saying this, but they haven't peed in their beds in weeks! They wake up to tell me they need to go to the bathroom... I never EVER could picture what it would look like to have completely potty trained children, but VOILA! What a luxury.
Mamma Bird
My sweaters. My neatly folded, color-coded, hand-washed, sun-dried wool sweaters. Now they lie packed in an anally prepared "under bed bag" with a cedar insert. I've offically lost my mind for all things that can be ORGANIZED. If you could bottle the hormone that makes pregnant ladies feel this incredible urge to "NEST" (ugh. I said it. "Nesting" is one of those maternity terms that I can't stand.) then I think you could prescribe it to all the college students that can't figure out how to finish a project or clean their dorm rooms. What I wouldn't have done to feel this motivated when I was 19!
The nesting instinct aside, I thought it was pretty hysterical to see the cohesive tonality in my sweater collection. Although I have about 25 more to wash, I can assure you they look almost exactly the same in color selection. Discovering that I really do have a stylistic preference when it comes to color shouldn't be a surprise to me, but seeing it all laid out nice and neat gives it more impact.
Which reminds me, I only have about 3 tank tops and 2 skirts that I can fit my large self into - and it's getting disgusting. Hopefully I won't add too many more grease stains to those cherished items in the next 4 weeks and passers by won't have to wonder about that poor poor overly pregnant and slobby lady with twins.
The nesting instinct aside, I thought it was pretty hysterical to see the cohesive tonality in my sweater collection. Although I have about 25 more to wash, I can assure you they look almost exactly the same in color selection. Discovering that I really do have a stylistic preference when it comes to color shouldn't be a surprise to me, but seeing it all laid out nice and neat gives it more impact.
Which reminds me, I only have about 3 tank tops and 2 skirts that I can fit my large self into - and it's getting disgusting. Hopefully I won't add too many more grease stains to those cherished items in the next 4 weeks and passers by won't have to wonder about that poor poor overly pregnant and slobby lady with twins.
Phat Mamma: 36 Weeks...
This might be the only pregnant Mollie shot that I offer up to my viewers. I should thank my mommy friend Jennifer for capturing the dramatic profile... with cookie nugget in hand, poised and ready to stuff it in my face. Note the box full of extra cookies from Dunkin' Fucknuts on the table behind me. (They are surprisingly tasty cookies. Seriously.)
The real reason I'm posting this to you folks: I'm miserable and uncomfortable! The Pickle has dropped lower since this photo was taken and I'm feeling it tearing my pubic bones apart. I have all sorts of funny Braxton-Hicks contractions that I never experienced with Ru and El and I can practically get my fingers around various baby body parts when I feel my belly because my uterus is stretched so thin. Sometimes I think I can even see the baby through my paper-like skin. I have no "pelvic floor" muscles left, but I still do my best to walk like a normal person. Poor Pickle's head will most likely emerge in a dramatic cone shape... especially if I manage to have the elusive VBAC.
Oh the VBAC... will you all send your collective vibes to my uterus and tell it to do the things it's supposed to this time? I'm pretty convinced everything will go as planned and I'll be able to deliver naturally, but a little loving energy from you all might help in the long run. That and a few more cookies and milkshakes.
The real reason I'm posting this to you folks: I'm miserable and uncomfortable! The Pickle has dropped lower since this photo was taken and I'm feeling it tearing my pubic bones apart. I have all sorts of funny Braxton-Hicks contractions that I never experienced with Ru and El and I can practically get my fingers around various baby body parts when I feel my belly because my uterus is stretched so thin. Sometimes I think I can even see the baby through my paper-like skin. I have no "pelvic floor" muscles left, but I still do my best to walk like a normal person. Poor Pickle's head will most likely emerge in a dramatic cone shape... especially if I manage to have the elusive VBAC.
Oh the VBAC... will you all send your collective vibes to my uterus and tell it to do the things it's supposed to this time? I'm pretty convinced everything will go as planned and I'll be able to deliver naturally, but a little loving energy from you all might help in the long run. That and a few more cookies and milkshakes.
Saturday, May 19, 2007
What Would We Do without Ammie?
Oftentimes my mom comes up to see us... I mean, a lot. She takes us to lunch at all the cool Providence restaurants and makes my life a whole lot easier. We go to gardening centers and she teaches us about plants and how to grow things. She buys us groceries. She takes my kids to the bathroom. She spoils the kids at toy stores and ice cream shops. She combs over catalogues with me and helps me conquer the next home decorating conundrum. We are partners in crime, to say the least. When she calls me up and says, "would you like me to come down and make dinner with you?" I'm happier than you might ever imagine. (Remember, Myles is "Q2" - a.k.a. absent)
But yesterday she called up to say that she and my dad wanted to come to take us out to their Anniversary dinner. Although I thought maybe they wanted to be alone, they insisted that after 33 years of marriage they would rather have the company of their grandkids at a pleasant restaurant than be by themselves.
We gorged ourselves at this bistro-style restaurant and left feeling rotund and stinking of garlic. I had a glass of red wine (although completely embarassed about drinking it in public) and it tasted like heaven.
Even though I have a lot of guilt about how generous my mom is to me, and I feel spoiled rotten by her, I completely get where she is coming from. The other day Ruby and Eloise's school prepared "Mother's Day Tea" for the moms. We arrived to their classroom and they cheered "Happy Mother's Day" and waved little cut-out pink tea cups decorated with glitter glue. Inside were little tea bags. We all sat at kid sized tables and had tea sandwiches - prepared ENTIRELY by the kids, and we were served (cold) tea in ceramic tea pots. I mean, cups, saucers... the whole thing... but 3 year olds pouring us tea! It was adorable. As they poured they said, "and we stop before we get to the top!" HA! I can only imagine how many overflows they must have had while practicing. Well, it made me want to burst with happiness at how proud they were of their achievements. They constantly amaze me and they are my best companions.
So, every day that goes by I get closer to understanding why my mom just gives every bit of herself to us. She's not capable of doing her job any other way.
But yesterday she called up to say that she and my dad wanted to come to take us out to their Anniversary dinner. Although I thought maybe they wanted to be alone, they insisted that after 33 years of marriage they would rather have the company of their grandkids at a pleasant restaurant than be by themselves.
We gorged ourselves at this bistro-style restaurant and left feeling rotund and stinking of garlic. I had a glass of red wine (although completely embarassed about drinking it in public) and it tasted like heaven.
Even though I have a lot of guilt about how generous my mom is to me, and I feel spoiled rotten by her, I completely get where she is coming from. The other day Ruby and Eloise's school prepared "Mother's Day Tea" for the moms. We arrived to their classroom and they cheered "Happy Mother's Day" and waved little cut-out pink tea cups decorated with glitter glue. Inside were little tea bags. We all sat at kid sized tables and had tea sandwiches - prepared ENTIRELY by the kids, and we were served (cold) tea in ceramic tea pots. I mean, cups, saucers... the whole thing... but 3 year olds pouring us tea! It was adorable. As they poured they said, "and we stop before we get to the top!" HA! I can only imagine how many overflows they must have had while practicing. Well, it made me want to burst with happiness at how proud they were of their achievements. They constantly amaze me and they are my best companions.
So, every day that goes by I get closer to understanding why my mom just gives every bit of herself to us. She's not capable of doing her job any other way.
Ru and El's First Paddle
Last weekend we had Myles with us for 2.5 days - so we headed up to Brattleboro to see his dad and Kathleen. That Friday night I opted out of a brief canoe ride, but Myles captured a couple of cute moments. This photo shows Eloise and Ruby in full command of the paddles. Jim is in the very front using his hands to direct the boat - apparently 3 year olds don't really get much momentum going in a canoe. The important thing however, is that they thought they were doing a fantastic job.
Every time I'm back in some part of VT I get really nostalgic and all worked up about what a special community I left behind. The Bratt. Farmer's market was a total treat to attend - we purchased a bunch of lettuces, herbs and some tomato plants for our garden. I stuffed my face with homemade doughnuts and indian food. The kids dug around in a sandbox and we ran into all sorts of familar faces. I also managed to stop into the hippie-est of all natural parenting shops to grab my supply of organic cotton baby diapers! Finally almost 3 years of using disposable diapers I have decided that going the cloth route for 1 child will be manageable. And if it turns out to be a nightmare, I won't be stubborn about keeping it up... we can totally do disposable for when we're on the road or if the big kid poops are just too fucking gross. (But after potty training 2, I'm a veteran to the Big Kid Poop in the undies scenario...)
So Vermonters and former Vermonters that are reading this - we miss you very much. Keep up the good work.
Every time I'm back in some part of VT I get really nostalgic and all worked up about what a special community I left behind. The Bratt. Farmer's market was a total treat to attend - we purchased a bunch of lettuces, herbs and some tomato plants for our garden. I stuffed my face with homemade doughnuts and indian food. The kids dug around in a sandbox and we ran into all sorts of familar faces. I also managed to stop into the hippie-est of all natural parenting shops to grab my supply of organic cotton baby diapers! Finally almost 3 years of using disposable diapers I have decided that going the cloth route for 1 child will be manageable. And if it turns out to be a nightmare, I won't be stubborn about keeping it up... we can totally do disposable for when we're on the road or if the big kid poops are just too fucking gross. (But after potty training 2, I'm a veteran to the Big Kid Poop in the undies scenario...)
So Vermonters and former Vermonters that are reading this - we miss you very much. Keep up the good work.
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